Monday, May 23, 2011

Republican faithful near despair at their plethora of ho-hum candidates who have underwhelmed America. It's time to prune to get serious!

by Christopher Hessman

Many years ago Nancy Saunders, one of England's celebrated gardeners, informed me in no uncertain terms of one of the essential conditions for horticultural success: prune, prune, ruthlessly prune. Find the little buds and, ruthlessly, cut them off, focusing on just one bud, the bud you have selected for greatness. A house full of gardening awards great and small, local and international, testified to the lady's insights and no-nonsense approach to a stunning garden and a reputation as diva, sorceress, sculpter of beauty, impatient with anything other than the eye-catching and important.

The Grand Old Party could learn a lot from Ms. Saunders and her stringent regimen for success.

Politically alert Americans, particularly Republicans, have watched with growing dismay, chagrin and (let's be honest) complete fascination as the party of Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt, and Reagan, titans all, revered by the nation, has become the Pee Wee league of presidential candidates -- and this despite stunning electoral success in 2010 and a Democratic incumbent who has failed, so far, to gain the affection of the nation and portray himself as more than the necessary evil.

In fact, there has never been (since its founding in 1856) so many GOP candidates for president with at least some (no matter how attenuated) claim to plausibility. Even in the days of brokered conventions with "favorite son" candidates given nomination just to impress the folks in Paducah, such lavish numbers were rare indeed.

Surely, the GOP should be glad that it has so many potential presidents at hand, but if you recall Nancy Saunder's stern admonition about how to produce gorgeous flowers -- prune, prune, prune -- you get the message that too many candidates produces weakness, not strength and is a sign that the party that believes America is safe when and only when it governs has lost its way, becoming rivulets, not the great river it has so often been.

This situation has produced torpor, procrastination, and a growing sense that the GOP is not up to the necessities for governing a great land beset by high and serious problems, and economic muddle.

The biggest most Republican donors are, in unprecedented numbers, sitting on the sideline, listless, uninspired, concerned. Fully 45 percent of Republican voters (as per a May, 2011 Associated Press poll) are dissatisfied with their presidential candidates, a figure that is growing, not diminishing.

Democrats, of course, are not-so-secretly thrilled by a scenario which already shows them far ahead in fund raising; (President Obama has made it clear he'll raise a billion dollars or more to keep the White House as his house), with GOP fissures now causing some of the donkey ilk to speak, not too loudly just now, of land slides and electoral college pulverization. Early days to be sure... but the possible is there, oh yes it is. It is unseemly for Democrats to be so exultant so early... but they are.

For Republicans to counter this political "Happy Days", they must Saunderize, at once, with a will, ruthlessly... for a chance to produce a winning candidate. Humbly, since no one of significance in the Grand Old Party has stepped forward with garden shears and  elimination list, I present myself accordingly. Without any expectation of power, privilege, patronage, or even gratitude, I am here to save the party, its chances for victory, and its (as yet) not obvious presidential candidate.

In the next few minutes, I intend, with a few deft moves, to change all that.

These Republican candidates (declared or still ruminating) are a bad joke:

Newt Gingrich, former Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives

Ron Paul, Congressman from Texas.

Michelle Bachmann, Congresswomen from Minnesota.

Rick Santorum, former U.S. Senator from Pennsylvania.

Rudy Giuliani, former Mayor of New  York City.

Sarah Palin, former Governor of Alaska.

Buddy Roemer, former Governor of Louisiana.

Herman Cain, Godfather's Pizza executive and Georgia talk show host. (An expert on three cheeses, but anything else?)

The unanswerable reasons for eliminating this drab, unappealing crew of Tweedle Dees and Tweedle Dumbs? Not one of them alone, or all of them together, have one ounce of charisma and the kind of  fundamental popular appeal a winning presidential candidate must have.  None is even remotely a household name (or done the exceptional to deserve it); some are so threadbare (Santorum) that they didn't merely retire from public office; they were booted out by local voters presumably the most knowledgeable about them.

In short, these are the Morgan Memorial, the Salvation Army candidates, colorless, spent, yawn making, infuriating... their highest potential service to the party to be placed as vice president on a sure-to-lose ticket.

Nice guys... too early.

Tim Pawlenty, former Governor of Minnesota.

Bruce Johnson, former Governor of New Mexico.

Jon Huntsman, former Governor of Utah.  These three have legs... but they are too short and undeveloped just now for the Oval Office. They should be planning to emerge, not now, but as the most beautiful, fascinating candidates of 2016. Needless to say, each will disagree vehemently with my patriotic assessment and so, like Pawlenty, build candidacies on the irrelevant details of personal resume. ("I was born in the meat packing town of South St. Paul; my father was a truck driver.") Stop it, stop it at once!

Some who were in or contemplating, now (gratefully) out.

Haley Barbour, Governor of Mississippi.

Mike Huckabee, former Governor of Arkansas.

Donald Trump, billionaire enfant terrible.

John Thune, U.S. Senator from South Dakota.

Mitch Daniels, Governor of Indiana.

We owe them profuse thanks and appreciation for reading the tea-leaves early and right; no one wanted them for any reason and certainly not for president.

What's left? Just one.

Mitt Romney, former Governor of Massachusetts, though capable of denying it, stiff, austere, little loved, policy wonk, 100% committed to becoming president, doing whatever he must.

Romney may very well be the eventual nominee, but he must learn how to rouse America and make us not only think well of ourselves... but do well, too, a surgent nation again.

No one from this huge field of candidates has been able to do this and make themselves seem the inevitable resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. And that's why Republicans of every stripe are becoming increasingly desperate, tossing even more names in the hat. They should instead solve the problem as Nancy Saunders would: prune, prune, prune. Then focus on turning the last bud into something glorious, historic, larger-than-life. For whatever pygmy we select today... by election day 2012 that candidate will have been massaged into history, person of legend, colossus. Let's hope by then he or she is ready for what we insist they be.......




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About the Author

Harvard-educated Dr. Jeffrey Lant is CEO of Worldprofit, Inc. , providing a wide range of online services for small and-home based businesses. Dr. Lant is also a historian and author of 18 best-selling business books.  Republished with author's permission by Christopher Hessman <a href="http://ProvenAutomatedBiz.com">http://ProvenAutomatedBiz.com</a>. Check out Massive Auto Traffic ->  http://www.ProvenAutomatedBiz.com/?rd=av3IrgKN

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