by Christopher Hessman
It's time to call a spade a spade. We are members of the most communications savvy and personally wired generation ever. Even the tiniest mite has her cell phone with camera. Yet the truth is, the explosion of communications tools has produced less real communication than ever; you and your poor communications skills are one of the culprits. Listen up! After all, it's time your communication skills improved to the level of your communications tools.
The quality of communications is not strained...
You, being an educated soul, are no doubt familiar with Portia's famous speech:
The quality of mercy is not strain'd, It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest: It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
(The Merchant of Venice. Act 4, scene 1.)
Bold and even impious, I now advise you (while great Shakespeare rolls in his grave) to change the word "mercy" to "communications," thus:
The quality of communications is not strain'd... it is twice blessed..."
And so it is. Good communications are good for the recipient and for the sender too.
You know this... but you do not act accordingly. Which is why this (shall we say) motivating article is so necessary and why you should take every single word to heart and make radical adjustments in your lamentable behavior.
Poor communicators (with the probability strong that you are one of them) exhibit these traits:
Arrogance. The human animal is a selfish animal, conceived in selfishness and nurtured in the belief that the Great Me, the universe-centered I Am is the most important animal anywhere at any time. As a result, this animal well and truly believes that she is so important that others must feel grateful, even when the communication is not returned. Oh, my!
People (like you?) who do not communicate effectively are people who are telling others, clear as crystal, that they are superior to you; that their time is more valuable than yours... and that these lesser folk need wait (and happily so) and wait and wait some more until you condescend to respond.
Such people by their behavior and non responsiveness clearly indicate that you and your concerns are, by definition, of infinitely less consideration than theirs. And that you'd best be glad for the little you get, for it is infinitely more than you deserve.
Poor communicators are slothful.
Good communicators, effective communicators realize that the business of communicating is like a tennis match. The ball must always be in motion between the communicator and those he wishes to communicate with. When the ball stops moving, the communication stops with it. The person who has stopped the communicating process is , by definition, the lazy, inhibiting one.
All too often the communication stops and is not extended because of unadulterated sloth. It takes work to communicate... it takes work to conceive a message and deliver that message. It takes work to be prepared and move matters to their next stage. However the slothful communicator can and does think of a myriad of "reasons" why he can obliterate the communications process without remorse. Thus he goes blithely on with his affairs while others, fuming, apply language which is ever more blue as time passes and their legitimate reasons for communicating go without any response whatsoever. Oh, my!
A special cycle of hell
For the intractable, for the miscreants arrogant and slothful who will not change, an idea: for them: a special cycle of hell wherein they are asked such questions as "are you hungry?" or "are you feeling hot and uncomfortable?" These hungry and uncomfortable miscreants answer and answer and answer. But response comes there none, ever. Delicious.
Help for the socially challenged and shy johns and janes everywhere.
Yet is the world of the non communicators made up solely and exclusively of the arrogant and slothful? Certainly not. It is also, and in significant numbers, the preserve of the shy, the timid, the socially malaprop, and untutored.
For them a single word: study.
There is one thing and only one thing which sets us apart and elevated from animals of every kind and place... and that one thing is communicating. So, if you truly wish to learn, improve and foster rather than retard communications, here is what you must learn and do.
1) Learn empathy, that crucial ability to enter into the minds and hearts of the people you are to communicate with. What is it they are expecting from you?
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About The Author
Harvard-educated Dr. Jeffrey Lant is CEO of Worldprofit, Inc., where small and home-based businesses learn how to profit online. Attend Dr. Lant's live webcast TODAY and receive 50,000 free guaranteed visitors to the website of your choice! Dr. Jeffrey Lant is the author of 18 best-selling business books, as well as being an internationally recognized marketer. Republished with author's permission by Christopher Hessman <a href="http://ProvenAutomatedBiz.com">http://ProvenAutomatedBiz.com</a>. Check out Massive Auto Traffic -> http://www.ProvenAutomatedBiz.com/?rd=av3IrgKN
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